DMW – Dead Men Walking… Undead Ed approves. Well, he did until he learnt that DMW are a bunch of geriatrics playing in a young man’s world. Now, to be fair, while he doesn’t know it, the Zombiegamer crew generally falls into that category too, but we act like 12 years olds when he walks into the room. Why? Because Undead Ed is actually **** scared of old people. Come on, it’s weird, but we don’t judge him.
So, other than being slow moving cannon fodder for more agile clans and gamers, what else makes Dead Men Walking unique? They were – up until a few months ago – the self-proclaimed “biggest [console] clan in South Africa” with around 40 members and averaged a whopping 43 years old per member with the oldest player being 63 years old. A recent restructuring has seen the number of members and average age of the clan drop – now coming in at nine players at an average of around 36 years old per player. We asked Craig ‘FairyGod
MotherFather’ a few questions, and he was kind enough to stop taking a nap to answer them.
Dead Men Walking has recently re-structured becoming two clans in RATM (Rage Against The Machine) and DMW, but before that happened, you were South Africa’s biggest clan. Give us a history lesson. When did you form?
Well we formed pretty much at the beginning of Modern warfare 2 days there were a few of us that played on a regular basis, ALL BALLIES and a few wannabe BALLIES. How I came up with the name was actually a hoot, let me explain. I was at home one day during the week messing around on Cod 4 and went into a lobby with Vandal, needless to say I was the xp cow for Vandal he was absolutely obliterating me, I was calling him every friggen four letter word in the book, he was just laughing (in my defence I had only started playing about 5 weeks earlier). At the end of the game I said to him wow I was a DEAD MAN WALKING, “click” brain fart and that’s how I came up with the name.
Did you start on a specific platform and due to a specific game?
Most of us had been playing Cod 4 on Xbox some had migrated from PC gaming, because we were all pretty much in the same boat either by age or similar gaming style and ethos we clicked. Also because especially on MW2 we could fill lobbies night after night with the same guys. The rest is history.
Are you still on the same platform or have you moved on?
Xbox Rules play station is for sissies and PC pretty much sucks.
Current clan game of choice?
Modern warfare 3 and on the odd occasion some BF3. Then on some nights we play chess and the odd game of monopoly. And when the chess becomes too intense we go play some MW3.
How many members did you have when you formed?
HHMMM to far back to remember us old folks battle to remember if we went to the toilet.
You guys – as a clan – appear to have quite a hefty history. And you were pretty hefty in terms of member size too. How did you manage 40+ players?
With great difficulty, as we grew and because so many people wanted in on DMW because of whatever criteria it did become hard. A lot of SA players wanted into our games because of our mentality of let’s talk kak and have fun and because we seemed to have the best lines to play on it became increasingly harder to accommodate all the DMW players that were online into our lobbies and the constantly re hosting of games to get DMW players in became a pain in the arse for some players. With the onset of Black Ops and the stuff up on the creation of lobbies it became almost impossible.
How many members now? Wanna waste time and list them maybe?
Well as you have already mentioned at our strongest we had about 40 members which excluded the junior team (our kids that played). But after the split we are down to 9 members. Pretty much the original crew par one or two exceptions.
- FairyGodFather – the man in charge, or at least I think I am.
- DominionZa – technical officer.
- Poizon – Bouncer.
- Ravesniper – Pretty boy.
- Dagga – His name says it all.
- Peppies – beverage manager.
- Maggot – Weapons expert and linguistic officer.
- DonShadow – Ladies man and chick magnet.
- Staalperd – Get out of jail free card.
Are you guys actively recruiting players? If so, how do you decide on who is right to join you?
No we are not recruiting players at this point unless its players from HI5 (ROFLMLWAO) or RATM. We have a good solid base at this point and have structured two teams based on stats.
Would you consider yourselves a competitive clan, or one in it more for “the shits and giggles”?
I don’t know if anyone reading this has ever played in our lobbies but we love shits and giggles and love pulling the piss out of people especially Google and Dastrix. However there were a few of us that took it more seriously than others, hence the split. We decided that the splitting up into two clans would allow the ones that wanted to be more competitive the chance to do so. Also it would be more manageable, the luxury here is that we have a huge amount of people we can call on should we need players to fill a spot going forward in clan games.
Won any tournaments you feel like bragging about?
We won the 2008 tidily winks world match play tournament.
We came second in the world geriatric thumb wrestling competition held in Slovenia in 2009
We got a third place finish in the 2010 whiskey drinking championships.
Na just messing with you, we are so new to clan games the clan connection competition was our first. Maybe one day we can show all you lighties we are a force to be reckoned with.
Other general history?
The Second Boer War (1899–1902), by contrast, was a lengthy war—involving large numbers of troops from many British possessions, which ended with the conversion of the Boer republics into British colonies (with a promise of limited zelf-bestuur). These colonies later formed part of the Union of South Africa. The British fought directly against the Transvaal and the Oranje Vrijstaat, defeating their forces first in open warfare and then in a long and bitter guerrilla campaign. British losses were high due to both disease and combat. The policies of “scorched earth” and civilian internment in concentration camps (adopted by the British to prevent support for the farmers/Boer commando campaign) ravaged the civilian populations in the Transvaal and the Oranje Vrijstaat.
[Based on their average age, we would not be surprised that it’s scars that attract the women to ‘DonShadow’ which were earned during their time fighting the British…]
Which clan do you respect/hate/want to be the most.
HI5 they rock, when we made the decision to split to allow the DMW guys to be more competitive the HI5 crew came to the party and assisted us with some tips etc. Hats off to them for helping us. We don’t hate any team it is more about disliking specific individuals. When you come into our lobby and your balls haven’t dropped don’t open your mouth cause your gonna get an instant MUTE.
Any plans for world domination in the future or are you planning something on slightly smaller scale?
PINKY AND THE BRAIN kinda stuff. Lol. Na we gonna take baby steps have the odd clan game, work on our team play and who knows maybe us old okes might just shock you down the line.
Boring stuff over…
If you weren’t a gaming clan you’d be…
REALLY OLD FARTS.
You have a clan mate pinned down by enemy fire. On the other hand, there’s a hot Swedish blonde back in the HQ offering Swedish back massages. Do you send the squad to a certain death to rescue your clan mate? Or chill at the HQ and have a massage and drink a toast to his “valour”?
Duh stupid question, I pay the bar tender to go rescue the guy, have a massage and plead ignorance to higher command should he not be rescued based on the fact the we couldn’t go rescue him because we are too old and frail.
If you guys had a music soundtrack for going to war, what would it be?
Okay this is a tough one. AC/DC hells bells, AC/DC thunderstruck. Rammstein ICH WILL, Rammstein Bang Bang.
Thanks for your time – I know for older guys such as yourselves it’s tough to concentrate this long – but is there anything you would like to add?
We would like to thank the Academy, our Wives our Moms and Dads our beloved children…. Seriously a shout out to Xtaz for an awesome win in the Clan Connection game, finger nail biting stuff. To Holden, Dastix, Google,Ionized, Illusionist, Bobjaan, Kbg, Jimmy, Oreo, Frankie and Nimrod thanks for the help over the past 2 months with the pointers on clan games. AND A MESSAGE TO THE HI5 crew “IM COMING FOR YOU”
If you’re keen to keep up with the guys from DMW, check out Craig’s Youtube Channel. A clan Youtube Channel is being worked on.
This is Craig’s “loving” homage to High 5. Seriously, get a room already…
If you are keen to feature in this column in the future, please feel free to contact us at email@example.com and we’ll think about – after you’ve sent us a sample of your braaaaaaiiiiinnnnsss.